FUNK

Memories

It was the chicken places birthday

"It's our birthday"

The man said to me

"It's your birthday?"

"No, not me

Bossy's"

I said happy birthday

To the restaurant

And placed my order

Very soon

My nephew and I

Had our food

Fried chicken

We were winning

The Temptations played in the background

And then James Brown

Jack drank Sundrop

For his very first time

Our conversation was light

And very funny

At this moment I was happy to be alive

Moments like this

Make life worth the strife

When we left

The man gave us free cookies

In honor of the birth

I got snickerdoodle

And Jack got chocolate chunk

"What is a snickerdoodle?"

Jack asked as we waited

"It's a doodle that snickers"

I answered

He laughed

And so

Did the guy

Behind us in line

I felt glad

He found that funny

We drove to the outskirts

Of downtown

With our Sundrop and cookies

And began our evening walk

To the Spectrum center

Fall is the best time

To smoke a stog

So I brought one out to light

And lit it

For this walk downtown

Jack asked me

How much skyscrapers weigh

"Millions of pounds

I'm sure"

"What if I bench pressed one?"

"Well, you'd be

The strongest man alive"

"Yeah"

"Or you'd be Godzilla"

"No, Godzilla had short arms"

"No, he had normal size arms

He's not a T-rex"

We argued about this a little

I thought to look up a picture

But I was enjoying the view

Too much for that to be entertained

I told Jack

That skyscrapers

Were man-made mountains

He agreed

We both talked about

How pleasing to the eyes they are

And then both agreed

Actual mountains were prettier

My cigarette was over

And that was disappointing

It was a great one

But I would no longer

Get judgmental stares

From random people

Because I was smoking

Beside a child

Had these people

Never heard of the 70's?

I had parked far away

So our walk was very long

And very enjoyable

We past the Omni-Hotel

"You know what omni means?"

I asked Jack

"What?"

"Everythang"

We made it the arena

I hid my lighter

Behind a trash can

No lighters are allowed inside

We went to the store

To buy a jersey for Jack

We picked the first one we saw

Some European man

Probably Swedish

Was staring into my eyes

Asking my opinion

On a jersey

"Are you talking to me?"

He asked again

I responded with my honest answer

He asked again

"I can't tell if he's talking to me"

I told Jack

"Me either"

We walked away

And checked out

Then went to our

Floor level seats

My father had hooked us up

Section 101

Row L

We made small talk

And watched the Hornets warm up

I could tell Jack was excited

And that made me excited

A couple sat next to me

I'm out of D.O. at this time

So I stink

Just a lil B.O.

Ya know?

The lady

I felt

Picked up on this immediately

My pheromones

Were about to fuck her up

For four quarters

By the second

I knew she couldn't enjoy the game

"He stinks"

I heard her say

I was hoping

She was referring

To the game

I also knew

That wasn't true

Not in this life

With me at her side

I'm pretty certain

The boyfriend

Refused to switch seats

I found that funny

It was a decent game

All-in-all we saw five alley-oops

But I knew the Hornets

Stood no chance

The Knicks were too good

I thoroughly enjoyed

Watching Brunson

He really worked us

It was still a fairly close game

And the couple to my left

Left

I felt bad for that man

I probably ruined his night

As the game ended

And the Knicks had won

The majority of the crowd

Chanted

"Let's go Knicks!"

I thought this

Was bullshit

The Hornets

Had an away game

At home

This reminded me

Of how my life

Felt at times

I guess Jack

Felt the same

And he began to cry

We both stood up

Sad

And walked out

I looked for my lighter

But it was gone

Jack continued to cry

A homeless man yelled at the crowd

As we all passed by

"Give me five dollars!

Come on!

Give me five dollars!"

I loved his attitude

But I didn't stop

"That's one way to do it!"

I said to no one in particular

Knicks fans behind me

Laughed with me

Jack cried

For two more blocks

We saw three frat boys

All standing

Chest to chest to chest

One said to the other

"I'll slap the fuck

Outta you"

A real helpless looking scene

We walked pass

And I told Jack

"Those guys are morons"

He began to laugh

"Yeah

Did you see that one

With the glasses?"

"Yeah

He looked hilarious"

We laughed

A good laugh

I love that moment

When sadness dims

And the light

Gets let back in

It shines

Brighter

Than before

If not

Just for a moment

We talked about

The fights we had seen

On the way

Back to the car

Walked over the bridge

And watched

As the cars rolled by

Made it to the car

And we both pissed in the lot

Jack felt I was too exposed

To the street

"No,

They can't see my weiner

From over there"

"Yeah,

Because it's so small"

I couldn't help but giggle

He set that up

Very nicely

Though the Hornets lost

We were winning

At this moment

I was happy to be alive

Moments like this

Make life

Worth the strife

I love these moments

When sadness dims

And the light

Gets let back in

It shines

Brighter

Than before

If not

Just for a moment

As we drove away

I knew

That another beautiful day

Had turned

Into what all things

Will someday

Be transformed

Into

Memories

The glue

Of what was

A me

And a you

Ungrateful Heart

If there is nothing that you desire 

Then follow that nothing 

To wherever it may lead

Don't make it halfway

And say there was nothing there

Follow nothing all the way

To where the sky

And outer-space collide

Don't do it for you

And certainly don't do it for me

But do it in honor of we

For all you know

You could be the only person left

That actually cares

About nothing 

But feel no pride

It is your duty 

To go all the way

If along the path

You just feel nothing but numb

Take that numbness all the way

Rub some lidocaine all over your face

And really feel despair 

If not for yourself 

But for everybody else

And one day you may wake up

From your numbing, nothing slumber

To a face

That you can recognize 

Has also been there

Say nothing with your words

But tell them with your eyes

That you care

Don't do it for them

And certainly don't do it for you

But do it in honor of we

And after their face has passed by

You may feel something new arise

From the slumbering grave

Of nothing and despair

From the ashes and bones

Of everyone who went all the way

And nothing was their tale

Like a newborn babe

Your mother will greet you there

Bringing you softly to her teat

And innocently you will suckle

Knowing that inches away

Is something that truly cares

We all know life is unfair 

But maybe 

Just maybe 

Our greatest burden 

That everyone has shared

Each playing our own little part 

Is the nothingness that follows 

An ungrateful heart

Why I Am Here

Today is not ordinary or perfect or great 

It is fine in my heart everything is as it is

You can't control the things that you see 

But you can with yourself

Boiiiii

- Jackson Ryder Travers

A Day Like Today

Hike a mountain

And leave your clothes at home

Take a bath in the sink

Be sure that afterwards 

You still stink

Whistle a tune backwards

While eating clam chowder

Forget everything you know

Then tell your friend everything 

That you don't know

Clasp your hands together 

And sing a mantra

About how you hate mantras

Call your mother 

And just breathe heavily 

When she answers the phone

Go to the middle of your town

Rub two bananas together 

And proclaim to the people

"This is pride!"

Watch them hide their children's eyes

Go to the nearest Catholic church

And confess you ate your dog

When the priest asks you to say that again

Tell him that you fucked your dog

Then proceed to masturbate 

Convince yourself you are a goblin

But tell everyone you feel like an elf

Pay attention to their faces

See if they notice your goblin like actions

Steal someones wallet

Return it shortly with everything 

But their library card

Go check out every book they have

On making bombs with it

Then call the FBI

But don't even tell them why

Just say "hi"

Go hike a mountain 

Stay there indefinitely 

When you have a day

Like you had today

It's the only proper place for you to stay

Mr. E

Looking back on the ancient days

With a modern mind

I find it very funny

An ancient museum 

Is one thing we never find

What is up?

With our preoccupation of the past

When we don't even live in the presence 

And only live for "tomorrow"

The ancients cared not for history 

For they were living it

They called it "my story"

Or the mystery 

I wish I knew a person 

Who was the culmination

Of all living cultures combined 

We'd call him Mr. E

Shit, this person may be you 

Or it may be me 

But I'm not concerned with his story 

It's his 

Not mine

All I'm concerned with

For the rest of time 

Is the mystery 

That is my story

Citrus Twist

I looked at the man

Then at the wall

Back to the man

Back again to the wall

Once more I'm staring at the man

But shortly I glanced back to the wall

This time when I looked over at the man 

I was in for a surprise

The magazine was no longer covering his eyes

And he was looking back at me

"You there"

He said to me

"I can tell you have some type of mental illness

But do please stop looking at me"

"Fine"

I said

"I will just stare at the wall"

And so I did

The wall was green just like a lime

And had a white border 

With little sail boats in the detail

There was no art on the wall

But there was a lemon nailed to it

My dentist was an odd man

"What a waste of a lemon"

I said to the man without looking over

He curled up the magazine

Then pegged me in the head with it

I fell out of my chair

The lady behind the desk 

Called the man's name to go back

On his way he plopped the lemon off the wall

And ate it like an apple

The lady at the desk got up 

And nailed another one to the wall

I asked the lady what they do 

For a tooth with a hole in it

"Nothing too bad

Just a shot in the gums

Pieces of old teeth glued into your hole

A simple fix have no fear"

I got up and sprinted for the door

As I was leaving I heard the desk lady say

"We got a runner!"

I made it to my car

Drove to the nearest gas station

Picked up a pack of Virginia Slims

I needed to calm my nerves

A fugitive outlaw

Running from a crazed dentist

Who never lets his patients get away

Driving down a country road at two in the morning

His team finally tracked me down

Shot out my tires

Pulled me out of the car and beat the shit out of me

They bashed me in real good

Threw me in the back of a van

Next thing I know I'm back in the lobby

There sits that man from earlier

His face was totally wrecked

All black and blue

I laughed

"You thought you could escape too?"

As soon as the words came out of my mouth

A rolled up magazine hit my face